Tag: Humor

‘Quick, Martha, Take a Picture!’

The folks at Gizmodo list seven things they never want to see photographed again. Sorry, travelers: “food” and “scenery” make the list. Don’t miss the accompanying cartoon dialogue—funny stuff.


23 Great Fake Travel Quotes

23 Great Fake Travel Quotes iStockPhoto

One strange travel quote got us started. The travelers on Twitter took it from there.

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The Strangest Travel Quotes of All Time

Travel ... six letters flowing like melted French Brie across two syllables.”—Cathy Salter, Sept. 27, 2010, Columbia Daily Tribune

The famous Twain quote and the Saint Augustine quote and so many other famous travel quotes—they’re just so earnest, aren’t they? After reading Cathy’s words of wisdom above it occurred to me that we could use a little more levity, a little more strangeness, a little more melted French brie in our famous travel quotes.

Inspired by her words, I humbly submit a few suggestions for the canon:


Got your own strange travel quote? Share it below, or join the #faketravelquotes conversation on Twitter. 


The Onion Reports: More Colleges Offering Dick-Around Abroad Programs

This just in from America’s finest news source: A growing number of colleges are now offering their students “the chance to spend every night partying in pretty much the same way they would have at home.” Lehigh University senior Christie Oden says she’s “dicked around in France and Australia.” She continues:

“I tell everyone I know: Definitely dick around abroad if you get the chance. It’s the best thing I did in college.”

For students like Oden, who are seeking opportunities to waste enormous amounts of time in a specific field, some schools offer specialized programs for dicking around abroad. Engineering majors at MIT, for example, can spend a semester in a drunken haze at the school’s Munich location, while juniors studying art history at Northwestern University may sign up for a year of yanking their puds in the museums of Paris.

(Via Adam Karlin)


Riding The Little Engine That Could

Riding The Little Engine That Could Illustration: Bill Russell

What if travel writer Paul Theroux had been aboard the train journey that became a classic children's book? Jim Benning imagines the account.

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Slate Takes a Nudist Vacation

“Human Guinea Pig” columnist Emily Yoffe bared all for journalism. Here’s the introduction to her resulting, funny dispatch:

The most disconcerting part of my visit to a nudist camp I’ll call “Hidden Bush” occurred when I got in a discussion about the benefits of nudity with a longtime member I’ll call “Dick.” Nudists, nudists will tell you, are very friendly, and Dick had spotted me as a newcomer as I stood naked and adrift by the pool. He came over to welcome me and proselytize for the benefits of nudism. He told me about the cruise he had taken to Alaska with 2,000 other naked people, and as I tried to envision all of this sagging flesh chugging toward unsuspecting caribou, I was distracted by a more immediate, awful sight. I could see myself reflected in Dick’s sunglasses. All of me. It was impossible to follow our chitchat as I watched my pale flesh quiver every time I made a gesture.


Eight Great Travel Twitter Tweets for August

Eight Great Travel Twitter Tweets for August iStockPhoto

What makes a good travel tweet? Here are eight favorites from the past month.

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Anxious About Full-Body Scanners? xkcd has a Solution

Here’s the web comic’s, er, modest proposal. (Via James Fallows)


Your Flight Attendant Jokes Do Not Amuse JetBlue

The airline’s been objecting to cracks about Steven Slater’s infamous emergency chute escapade via its official Twitter account. Of course, this only inspires the tweeting jokers to new heights; here’s comedian Andy Borowitz’s response: “At @JetBlue you have to pay $5 extra for a sense of humor. Exact change, please.”

Meanwhile, the New York Times has unearthed the 1947 story of a Bronx bus driver who got fed up with his job—and took his rig on a 1,300-mile joy ride. That sounds even better than a trip down the inflatable slide, no?


Eight Great Travel Twitter Tweets for July

Eight Great Travel Twitter Tweets for July iStockPhoto

What makes a good travel tweet? Here are eight favorites from the past month.

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Video You Must See: ‘Newport (Ymerodraeth State of Mind)’

In this Welsh town, "Chips, cheese, curry makes you feel brand new." Take that New York and Jay-Z.

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Where’s the Perfect Presidential Vacation Spot?

Over at McSweeney’s, Chris White looks back at the presidential vacations of yore, and wonders where—in a much-changed America—today’s presidents should go. Here’s White:

We need something isolated, like an island. But not just any island. Martha’s Vineyard is easier on the Secret Service, but it comes at a terrible price: you are known as the kind of person who vacations in Martha’s Vineyard. Public opinion takes no vacations, and you cannot be a man of the people while throwing champagne in the face of the insolent butler who smudged your boat shoes. Harry Truman had the right idea, chilling out in earthier Key West—but there was much less vomiting and public nudity in Key West those days, even when Hemingway was in town.

Last summer, our own Tom Swick had a few presidential vacation suggestions of his own. (Via @travelerlauren)


The Onion: Data-Recording Parrot Recovered From Plane Wreckage

The Onion News Network has the scoop:


World Cup of Travel: Spain vs. The Netherlands

The FIFA World Cup will be settled Sunday. We'll settle which country in the final is the best travel destination right now. Let's go to Robert Reid's chart.

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‘Thrill Ride Alternatives for the Anxious’

Some theme park comedy from World Hum contributor Kate Hahn. Try riding the “Pit of Comfort”:

For something a little different from Disneyland’s “Tower of Terror.” In this softly-padded shallow crater, riders lie prone and watch a condensed three-minute episode of a classic sitcom where everything turns out all right in the end and the jokes aren’t too hard to understand. Then everyone looks under his or her seat cushion to find a “winning lottery ticket” which can be used to purchase comfort food in the adjacent snack area. Actually lowers heart-attack risk.

The rest of the rides are over at McSweeney’s.


Eight Great Travel Twitter Tweets for June

What makes a good travel tweet? Here are eight favorites from the past month.

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Audio Story: Tagish Elvis and Me

elvis! Photo by kevindooley, via Flickr (Creative Commons)

In Skagway, Alaska, Pam Mandel finds an unlikely way to salvage a bad trip

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Travel Reads for Summer Laughs

The Baltimore Sun offers up a list of funny travel books for your summer beach-reading needs. Three of our 100 Most Celebrated Travel Books of All Time—“In a Sunburned Country,” “Under the Tuscan Sun” and “The Innocents Abroad”—made the cut. (Via The Book Bench)


Why My Travel Book Will be Called ‘Walk the Lost World of the Great Black Sea’

I’m confident it will be a best seller. Here’s why: I fed the titles of the 100 most celebrated travel books of all time into a word cloud creator, and, as you can see, all the words in my title are quite popular.

Readers and critics will love my book. Sean Penn will buy the movie rights. I will be rich.


Video: Celebrating Dubious Achievements in Travel

The Titanic Awards offers up a highlight reel of travel fails: