Call It Multiple Personality Packing Syndrome

Or MPPS for short. Perhaps you suffer from it: packing way too much for more than one personality that you may exhibit on your trip, from the no-nonsense traveler who favors sensible shoes to the strutting fashionista who wears only the latest from Prada or Jimmy Choo. Christine Schoefer, who comes clean about her packing problems in Sunday’s San Francisco Chronicle, doesn’t identify her condition as MPPS, but the symptoms she describes clearly identify her as a sufferer. “In my travel reveries, I am a mixture of Carrie Bradshaw, Edith Wharton and Bruce Chatwin,” she confesses.

She starts off packing light, choosing simple outfits. Rick Steves would be proud. But then her inner Carrie Bradshaw reveals herself and Schoefer envisions her most fabulous self in the most fashionable attire. That’s when things go awry.

“A few hours before the airport shuttle arrives at my door,” she writes, “I dive into the deep recesses of my closet and bring to light all those frivolous and impractical items that struck my fancy on other vacation-inspired spending sprees: the multicolored silk skirt (too wild), the lime-green linen shift (wrinkles terribly), the stretchy striped tank top (too revealing, doesn’t match the skirt), the leopard-textured stockings (to go with what?).”

It gets ugly. Blisters form on her feet. She misses her raincoat. She swears she’ll do better next time.

Of course you will, Christine. Of course you will.

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