Oh, the power of a good mushroom soup. There was actually a little more to the story of why a Ryanair plane had to make an unscheduled landing in Germany. 

We often put a sarcastic or humorous spin on tales of airport woe and aggravation, but this story struck me as just plain sad. Sure, it’s unfortunate that increasingly absurd airport measures are becoming the norm, but to imagine we’re at the point where a 78-year-old woman, in a huge misunderstanding with Swedish airport personnel, considers being asked to climb in a baggage chute as a reasonable request—and does so—is just ... unreasonable. 

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I can almost imagine how giant underwire bras might prompt an airport security brouhaha, but now bacon—that most innocuous of breakfast meats—has reportedly done it? Oh, the humanity!

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The Times of London has an entertaining retrospective on the development of business class service over the past three decades. My favorite innovation? In 1983, Thai Airways pioneered the concept of meal selection: “So now you can choose between the Chicken Legs and the Beef Stroganoff.” Ah, those were the days.

Related on World Hum:
* The Long Descent: US Airways to Charge $2 for Soft Drinks

Photo by Natecull via Flickr (Creative Commons)

I’ve said it before, but here it goes again: Airline news items these days are becoming positively Onion-esque, and this one’s no exception. Air Canada subsidiary Jazz has removed the life vests from its fleet to help shed a few pounds, the CBC reports. The floating seat cushions will remain; apparently, only one of the two devices is required on flights that remain within 50 nautical miles of the mainland. 

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Massive flight delays are taking place across the United States today, caused by computer problems at a Federal Aviation Administration facility, CNN.com reports. The administration said there are no radar outages, and it has remained in contact with all planes. Only flights waiting to take off are being affected. “This is really not a safety issue, this is an aggravation issue,” said CNN aviation expert Miles O’Brien.

Photo by Larsz via Flickr, (Creative Commons)

Ladies (maybe some gents, too?), I suggest you think twice before donning an underwire bra before flying. At Oakland International Airport, a “big-busted woman wearing a large underwire bra” set off a metal detector, the San Francisco Chronicle reports, prompting what the woman, Nancy Kates, believed was overzealous and humiliating scrutiny during the routine pat down. 

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Mark Sarvas over at The Elegant Variation posts A Brief Rant and an email for you to clip and send to your favorite airline. It says, in part: “Recently, while waiting to board your flight number [FLIGHT NUMBER] at [YOUR AIRPORT], I was startled to hear your gate attendant use the phrase ‘last and final boarding call’ on several occasions. I assume you realize that your attendant is calling for a ‘last and last’ boarding call.” And the letter’s kicker: “I urge you to fix and rectify this situation at your earliest convenience.” We’re all for it—as long it doesn’t inspire our favorite sign-correcting “vigilantes” to get into more trouble. Deep breaths, guys.

Surfers are being gouged by many airlines when they travel with their boards, and, rightfully, they’re pissed. “The charges have gotten so gnarly that some professional surfers are calling for a boycott of airlines that have high fees and are putting out their own personal lists of surfer-friendly carriers that wave riders should patronize,” writes Peter Pae in the Los Angeles Times. Among the airlines surfers are calling out: Delta, Continental and United. Each charges a minimum of $115 for domestic flights, and up to $300 for international trips. 

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The investigation into yesterday’s crash of the Spanair MD-82 that killed 153 people continues. Meanwhile, “Measured by accident data alone,” The New York Times reports, “the MD-80 is considered to be one of the safest planes in the sky.”

Related on World Hum:
* Nearly 150 Dead in Madrid Plane Crash

Fifteen additional planes will offer wireless Internet service for laptops and PDAs beginning today for $12.95. Reports USA Today: “If the service is deemed successful after three to six months, American Airlines plans to roll out the service to the rest of its domestic fleet.” Yes, slowly but surely, airline by airline, plane by plane, we’re moving closer to a day when the sky is one big, happy internet cafe.

Beginning tomorrow, you won’t have to pull your computer from your bag—if your bag meets new TSA standards.

Related on World Hum:
* Laptop With Personal Info of 33,000 Travelers ‘Probably Stolen’
* Disclosed: Travelers’ Laptops Can be Confiscated at U.S. Borders Without Reason